Do you ever feel like high school never ends, like going home to your parent’s house and getting in an argument is the natural order of things, regardless of how old you are?
Maybe you see this phenomenon when your usually rational partner reverts to being a teenager when they’re overtired or you observe someone having a tantrum in the middle of the grocery store. It could even be watching one of your grandparents becoming suddenly fixated on something they haven’t cared about since childhood.
Well, it turns out that there is a medical term for that: age regression. Gary Small, MD, a geriatric psychiatrist and the chair of psychiatry at Hackensack University Medical Center, says that age regression, on its face, has a clear definition.
“Age regression in adults is essentially when an individual starts behaving in a more childish way than appropriate for their age. And so it’s a regression in the sense that they go back to a mental and behavioral state from earlier in their life, usually during their childhood.”
In this article we’ll look at why and how it happens, who it affects, and the steps you can take to self-regulate should it happen to you.
What Happens During Age Regression?
Age regression is a psychological process that can occur at any age. Some examples include:
- In a pediatric setting, where a child has lost the ability to perform an age-appropriate task since their last appointment
- An adult who acts more like a child when they are in the throes of a meltdown or a panic attack
- A senior with a degenerative brain condition who is reverting to a previous version of themselves.
Whatever the cause, and whatever the stage of life, age regression can have a significant effect on the day-to-day experiences of yourself or someone you love.
Gary Small, MD
Age regression in adults is essentially when an individual starts behaving in a more childish way than appropriate for their age.
— Gary Small, MD
Age regression has fascinated those working in the field of psychology for decades, so naturally, there are multiple theories as to why it happens.
Sigmund Freud believed that age regression is a way to protect yourself and is an unintentional practice. Other giants in the field of psychology, like Carl Jung, viewed age regression more optimistically in the sense that, in his view, age regression occurs because a person is leaning into the child-like belief that they can do something.
Causes of Age Regression
Let’s face it, our world today is anything but calm. We have wars on multiple continents, bitterly partisan upcoming elections, climate change, relentless heatwaves, concerns over potential future pandemics, and more.
What does this have to with age regression? Well, In both adults and children, one of the main causes can be a period of extreme stress. Research has also found that past trauma can be a key component. In seniors, age regression can also be connected to cognitive decline and associated brain-based disorders like Alzheimer’s and various forms of dementia.
Some examples of age regression behaviors might include sucking your thumb, curling up in the fetal position, or calling out for a parent in the same way a young child might. There is some scientific evidence that social media can influence age regression, although much of the research published on the topic is focused on youth.
Meltdowns, a common experience for those on the autism spectrum that people are often looked down upon, can also manifest as a form of regression alongside autistic burnout.
Small says that it’s important to keep in mind that age regression is often akin to a “cry for help” and that there are a wide range of treatable underlying causes that can lead to regression, including depression.
“Age regression can threaten the person with other problems and can be life-threatening at times… It could be a medical condition, an electrolyte imbalance, medication side effect, or a substance abuse problem.”
Christopher Norman, GNP-BC, a geriatric nurse practitioner and a medical reviewer for the National Council on Aging, says that, within the older population, it’s important to focus on ensuring that the person exhibiting the age regression behaviors is getting support as they move through that experience.
“When you realize and sort of appreciate that [in] a person with cognitive decline, a very legitimate neurodegenerative issue as in the case of Alzheimer’s disease or another form of dementia, you’re not necessarily going to bring that person back to your state of mind. So, if I’m looking at it from a logical perspective, the idea that I’m going to bring a person with a neurodegenerative disease to my level to see that logic really doesn’t make a whole lot of sense.”
Getting Treatment and Support
Age regression can be upsetting when you see it happening to someone else, especially in elderly loved ones who are experiencing it as a result of cognitive decline.
There are numerous supports and treatments available for those experiencing age regression, including various types of mental health therapy. However, if you’re experiencing the regression—or if you’re part of the support system of someone who is—experts we spoke to made it clear that the first step is zeroing in on showing empathy.
In older adults, Norman says that taking steps to acknowledge that the age regression is happening, rather than getting frustrated, is a step people who are in a person’s support network—friends, family, and caregivers—can take.
“The long and the short is really validating that behavior and validating where the person is, in that moment is going to cause that person a whole lot less frustration and you, the caregiver, it’s going to contribute to less frustration on your end as well.”
Norman, a parent to a young child, says that looking at age regression behaviors with a little distance, regardless of age, can help frame how we see ourselves and others.
“There’s a lot of individual humanity I think that we can learn about. There are different parts of a person’s story that we can learn about when we approach these age-regressed situations or behaviors, from a point of kind of cool logic to some extent, These moments in cool clarity, can be really good insights into the importance of the people in our lives, and the structure and the routine that we have in our day.”
In terms of addressing age regression yourself, Small says there are some indicators that you can stay in tune with.
“If you notice yourself starting to cry and weep a lot and It’s disturbing, and it’s dysfunctional, it’s impairing your life. That should be an aha moment. ‘Okay. It’s happening again, what’s stressing me out? Let me get to the bottom of this’… That could be a red flag to search your own personal universe to see if you have to attend to something.”
So, to summarize, the key steps for dealing with age regression are:
- Acknowledge the age regression is happening
- Validate the behavior and where the person is at emotionally
- Show empathy
- Take a second to properly notice the feelings (if it is happening to you) and try to identify the stressor
Keep in Mind
If you or a loved one are experiencing age regression it is important to recognize that this is not an uncommon behavior, regardless of a person’s age. Age regression can be part of growing up, but can also be connected to brain health or trauma.
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